Dear New York Times...

[evilhippo]

Dear New York Times,

You are scaring me lately. First it was the article on xkcd publishing a book through an obscure company (which, I mean, every webcomic artist does that. Really.) Then it was the ridiculously fawning travel article about Portland a few days ago (goshdarnit I need to go visit people over there.) And today... there's this. It even involves a picture of Obama photoshopped as a Vulcan.

As someone newly empowered with a nifty wireless device that lets me read you before I even get out of bed in the morning, you can see why this sort of thing is a real concern. See, you're kind of important, and it unnerves me when you cross the line into what looks like fandom. (Very little looks more like fandom than that editorial. Eesh.) Your job is to provide me news. I have other places to find unnerving photoshopped images, and I'm afraid if you continue on like this, you are going to do worse things to me than make me want to move to Brooklyn (which you are seriously responsible for, by the way, by being all "Artisans! Handmade foods! And all your bands live here, you know! There are entire buildings encouraging nothing but jazz musicians to live in them. I bet you'd like it here.") Don't make me feel like my geekishness is validated! I don't know what to do when that happens.

I still love you, though, you ailing bastion of the liberal media elite. I'm sorry I don't pay to read you.

- evilhippo

P.S. Yes, I know if I actually read the news, and not the opinion columns and travel and food sections, I probably wouldn't have this problem. But the economy is so boring.

Comments

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

I guess it depends on how old his daughter is. It is kind of a Hipster Mecca these days. And you guys have basically one of the only functioning music scenes in the country. Someday, I'll find Chicago's actual, home-based music scene. You'd think the Pitchfork office here would have found it if it existed, though. Not that they're useful for much. (I am eternally bitter that Pitchfork is located here, because they are ALWAYS snarking at my concerts, and I take it personally. Also, they're guilty of not hiring me.)

[zolac-no-miko.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I mentioned the hipster/music scene among my reasons for why a young person might especially want to visit here. Also the infinite number of microbreweries. He mentioned the rose festival.