Insomnia

Curse those stupid storms keeping me up. I wish I hadn't slept in until ten today, because now I'll never fall asleep. I can barely type, too. Maybe I am actually tired. There's something different about listening to music after midnight. It's nice to sit alone in the dark and just listen, you notice a lot more of what goes in the songs that way. I've noticed that half the songs on my playlist I haven't listened to all the way through are actually pretty good. Or maybe it's because they're different from the ones I overplay. Out of 206 songs, there ought to be something new and interesting every once in a while. Curses, it's 12:30. I guess I'll go off to attempt to go to sleep. Hopefully I won't trip over all the boxes in my room on the way to my bed, and wake up my sister again. Tonight was her first time at work... she's ushering like I did last year. She doesn't seem to mind it much, which is good because she owes me thirty dollars and claims that she'll pay me back. I don't expect it, and even if she gives it to me, it'll likely go towards something for her.

Sigh... I feel so lonely right now. It's not so much that I can't go out anywhere with my friends, which I hardly ever did anyway, it's just that the for doing it is gone. And I've still got three weeks of this. I'm getting all nervous now, too (though that could be because of my medicine and the shot). What the heck have I gotten myself into? I mean, my family just got the bill, and it's 2,700-some dollars, which is insane because that's three quarters of the contibution from me and my family. So much for 100% of my financial need. We can't pay that all at once (actually, we can, but I'll have no money left to cover my share of the computer or my books). The insurance for my stupid track participation is 500 dollars a quarter. If I sneeze, I'll be running to the doctor just to make all that money worth it. Hopefully when my dad's new insurance kicks in in November, we won't have to have it through the UofC for the rest of the year, and all the evil Orientation fees and flex dollars will be off the bill (which is about a thousand). And I'll have my work-study money. I'm so confused about what's going on. Seeing the bill makes me think of how much I'm borrowing, and how much debt I'll have at the end of four years (17 thousand my behind!) and how on earth I'm going to do that and go to grad school. I guess I'll have to go teach in an inner-city school or something. Or flee the country. Do credit ratings follow you to France? Would France hide me from the US loan-debt collectors? I promise to be verily nice to the French if they will. They'd be my best friends. Hooray for France! Maybe I'll spend my last quarter abroad and then neve come back. The government would have paid the money to the University, non? I'm pretty sure in my entrance interviews, they told me the money is owed to the government, but I think it also said something about making payments to the school. Silly things.

Wow, Vanilla Pepsi really has a lingering vanilla odour. Right.. sleep. One more song...

Ostriches?

OK, in my dream last night my sister and I were playing this strange game where the main character was Mickey Mouse or something. If you didn't jump off the first ledge really quickly, it disappeared. My sister got really frustrated, so I took over and ended up making it up three levels. Then, all of a sudden, I was inside the game, and I was falling down. I fell through a line of stars, and ended up in a little cave off to the side. It was full of little chocolate frogs, and I complained that they had made them look a lot more real in Harry Potter. I kept looking around, and there were some chocolate ostriches, too. I collected a lot of the ostriches, and it was like the ostrich tokens in Donkey Kong, and an ostrich appeared to follow me around (or I turned into an ostrich... I don't quite remember). But I flew/flew on the ostrich up into another cave, and it was full of strange bags and giant machines that all had dollar values on them. It was dark at first, and I didn't notice the 56.99 printed on the giant bag of chocolate and buttons that I opened, and I had to eat all the chocolate to get it for free. I didn't mind, since it was mostly buttons, and I went through and pulled out the ones I wanted to keep.

At least I got more than five hours of sleep, though. I think I need to do something today so I can get to sleep before about one. Those stupid storms completely screwed up my sleep schedule. It was a precarious schedule, anyway. It requires me to actually have enough willpower to get up in the morning when I first wake up, rather than rolling over and going back to sleep.

I've decided that I should stop worrying about my freaking college loans, because they're not going to be any more than it would be to buy a nice car, and I know lots of my former classmates going to YSU are going to go out and do that, and if they can afford to borrow twenty-some thousand for a car, I can certainly afford to borrow that much, go to the UofC, and not have to pay it off until after grad school, likely at a lower interest rate. So nya! Take that, world!

The cat fell off the table and took my arm with him. It's bleeding, and it looks like I did a terrible job of trying to kill myself. Lovely! Hehehe. So, I must be off to arrange things with my shopping buddy! Yaaay! I'm not as alone as I act! I just do that for your pity. Pity! Mwahahaha!

Random thoughts...

People that have those bear rugs that have the entire bear still together... do they ever trip over the head?
Why is there a coat rack in the middle of the room in the middle of summer with one scarf on it in the Subway commercial, besides as a way to make a pointless joke?

Ah, also, I've edited my quiz, and obviously you lazy weirdos have neglected to take it. Take it now, darn you! I see that it has been taken 80 times, but I know it wasn't you, because you didn't tell me! Grrr!

( Pointless quizzies! )

I just crossed 159,001 miles on my car. Which is rather impressive. I'm not sure how I should celebrate, besides being grateful that it's still running even though I put almost twenty-five thousand miles a year on it. I've grown rather attached to it in the two years that I've had it. I orignally lobbied for it because it had a CD player and didn't look stupid, but I love all of it now (except that its brakes aren't exactly perfect, and I can't get them fixed).

Hmm... I've gone an gotten myself addicted to strange remixes of game themes. How bizarre of me. I blame the people on the Wigu board, and the thread that I know was there, but doesn't seem to be there anymore. This makes me want to go play Super Mario. I know I'm bringing my SNES to Chicago now, even if my sister tries to stop me.