Nice knowing you, 2010

[evilhippo]

I'm about a day late in seeing 2010 off properly, but I'm always keen on keeping up recent traditions. As such, I give you the yearly...

The Random Of 2010

To start things off... this year has been kind of hard to describe. There really can't be that many more years in the future where I can say "I think I've grown up a lot this year," but I have a pretty good streak going here, and I don't mind it continuing. (So long as I don't grow up to the point where I stop thinking stupid jokes are funny. I'll grow up, but I refuse to take it seriously.) I feel like more happened than usual, but when I look back there are only a few major events and either nothing else happened, or those bigger things overshadow everything else to the point that it feels like nothing else happened. (These things being: my failtacular attempt to quit my job and my subsequent solo trip to Paris/London... and, to a lesser though more far-reaching extent, writing fiction on a regular basis for the first time since about 2007.)

But not having any idea what I'm writing about has never stopped me before, so!

Story I Have Told Over And Over To Everyone: Hands-down, I have told the story of my run-in with French security at the Eiffel Tower more than anything else this year. So much so that I can shout "jetez-la dans la poubelle!" without having to remember what the guard said phonetically and then fit the conjugation and agreement to it every time (which is, sadly, what I did the first three or four times I told it). I think I tell this story so much because 1) it's ridiculous and 2) it's fun to shout "ees a naiif, ees daenjeruus!" and "jetez-la dans la poubelle!" and also because 3) it tends to distract people well enough that they forget that their original question was "What did you do in Paris?" because "I went to cemeteries and the catacombs and it was awesome!" is generally not a proper response.
Runner up: The odd story of my second year roommate boiling her bras in my pans without asking has made a significant resurgence this year.

Best Robot Apocalypse: Transformers filming downtown. I have a feeling the wanton destruction and general disarray on our streets was far, far more entertaining than the actual movie will be, though.

Best Rock Performance That Was Probably a Hallucination: ZZ Top at the Crossroads Guitar Festival.

Best Concert With Or Without Possible Sunstroke: Probably Patrick Watson, back in May. He can keep a crowd in thrall like few others I've seen. (As an aside, however, I went to far too few concerts this year. Something I aim to remedy next year. I think, actually, that there was just this, Crossroads (which my mom dragged me to), Frontier Ruckus (which I attended because one of my friends knows the band), and Yeasayer two days ago (which was great save for the chatty pot-smoking girls who kept stomping on my feet and the fact that all the dancing near the end pinned me against the sound board very uncomfortably. But, moving on!)

Most Stalkerish Fast Food Chain: Pret A Manger, which I first encountered everywhere in London and then, three weeks after I got back, appeared in Washington DC and then when I got back from DC and was walking to my bus there was one under the Sears Tower parking deck and I swear it just was not there before.

Worst Driver/Human Being: The guy downtown who nearly knocked me into traffic with his car door and then assured me that I didn't need to worry about the car.

Arch-Enemy: CAR DOORS

Obligatory Heading About My Nightmare Job: In which I avoid the subject because, yeah.... (Note of warning: don't get me started on this! So far I've managed to avoid griping about the client that wants me fired, but once started I could go on forever!)

Most WTF CTA Moment: Being ignored by a bus driver only to later see the same bus crashed on Lake Shore. (Remarkably, other than this, I did markedly less complaining about the CTA this year. I suspect that's because I didn't use it for eight months out of the year, though, and it isn't due to any kind of increase in quality.)

Reason I Will Never Stop Complaining About The CTA Not Being Where I Think It Should Be: I still don't remember that I can text the CTA and get the bus status, or that I should check the bus tracker before I leave the apartment so I'm not standing outside waiting in the cold/rain forever. Though, to be fair, the 55 can supposedly be five minutes away and I'll still end up standing outside for 15, because that's just how the 55 works.

Worst Attempt at Flirting: The Reddit Bus Method.

Only Painting in the Louvre I Looked at and Then Went Back to Again Just to Make Sure I Hadn't Imagined It: The Blessed Ranieri Frees the Poor from a Prison in Florence. I plan it use it as a picture-prompt some day to encourage some very unusual writing.

Best Torrential Downpour Tourism: Hiking around the north side with flutingfrenzy, who was willing to sacrifice dryness for adventure at the hands of an unpredictable local. Both sandals and actual feet were harmed, but it was worth it!
(Special Downpour Tourism Board Honors go to Andalous, the Moroccan restaurant that didn't turn us away despite the fact that we were dripping considerable amounts of water onto their floor.)

Etc.:
Kitchen appliances purchased: 0
Extravagant kitchen accessories purchased: 2
Confessions of Love: 0
Pairs of Converses worn out: 1
Proper winter foot attire worn: 1
Pairs of shoes resurrected from several years ago: 2
Books I was on the cover of: 0
[A]political rallies attended: 1
Major landmarks I nearly fell asleep in front of: 1
Buses I have missed: Countless
Months I spent biking instead: 8
Biking accidents: 3
Biking accidents involving car doors: 2
Biking accidents involving poorly-placed hoses: 1
Flat tires: 3
Stigs killed: 1
Job interviews: 1
Job applications: Countless
Fics posted: 8 (some anonymously)
Holiday time off compared to last year: -1
Pies I still owe random strangers: 1
Hours it has taken me to compose this entry: 1

Comments

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Omg the CTA finally got their stuff together for the tracker thing? YESSSSSSS! The one thing I appreciated about TriMet over CTA was that TriMet had accurate phonecall tracking stuff. I know CTA is sort of like... Made of assholes. But like, at least there are lots of routes and a significant number of buses on those routes that run like... more than once a fucking hour. I'm sorry, it takes me eleven minutes on the outside to drive to work. It takes an hour and a half to get there by bus, thanks to a FORTY MINUTE WAIT between buses. Because one only runs once every seventy minutes. I mean just WHAT.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

I am actually very impressed with the progress the CTA has made this year. In some places on the red line it'll actually tell you exactly how long before the next two trains arrive (something I loved about Paris and London, though they gave you the next five).

Eleven minutes to drive and an hour and a half to bus is just... I don't even understand how that works (it'd probably be faster to walk!). I thought it was bad that it takes me an hour and ten if I take the 55 and the train vs. 40 if I walk almost a mile up to the 6 (counting the walk).

What is even the point of a bus that only comes once every seventy minutes? There's no way that's convenient for anyone, and it wouldn't even show up at the same time every hour. As much as I love complaining about the CTA, I know the systems in smaller cities are far worse. When I used to go up to London, Ontario to visit my Canadian we had to plan everything exactly right because her buses were on once-every-40-minutes schedules.

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Oh that is awesome. Yeah, in Japan they've had that system for like, ever, idek. Not that it matters, since if a train is like, 30 seconds late or something, it's literally on every news channel first thing that evening. No joke. But WAY TO GO CTA! What's a 30-day pass cost these days? I know Portland was about $15 more than Chicago when I moved here and I could never justify buying one, even before I had the car.

No, I can't even. Just. Ange has to deal with it still, since I use the car for work. Her job is a bit further out, like, 18 minutes driving, ish, but it takes her a good hour to get there by bus. And if I hadn't sold my bikes to enable moving here, I'd probably have pre-car considered biking to work, but the problem with that is the epic EPIC uphill I'd have to deal with coming home. And also like, the complete lack of bikeable terrain between home and work. Whatever they tell you about Portland being super-bikefriendly? It's a fucking lie. Unless that was just the city council congratulating themselves on not being Savannah where motorists literally swerve to try and RUN DOWN cyclists. Chicago has ironically high marks for bikeability in comparison to the other four states I've held residence.

I don't really pretend to understand the 70-minute thing. Like, I think there are two buses running the route at once, with some kind of weird overlap that lets them alternate getting there within the first twenty minutes of the hour..? I don't know. I just know that when I had to take public transit to and from work, I'd get off the 9 just as the 43 (70-minute route line) would get to the transfer, and this one time it was pulling up and I was going to have to run across traffic and this suburban mom lady was in front of me in the doorway to get off with her little ADD toddler who just kept milling in circles and I was all UH OMG THAT IS MY BUS I KIND OF NEED TO GET OFF LIKE THIRTY SECONDS AGO PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE and she just kept trying to corral her kid and saying soothingly (to the kid? to me? idek) "We're aaaallll going to get our turn to get off. We're aaaallllll going to get our turns." Seriously. Homicide should have a legality clause.

I feel no remorse for possibly kicking a toddler in the shin in order to catch that bus.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

30-day passes are up to $86, which is right on the border of what's justifiable.

It's kind of funny, Chicago is trying harder now to be bike-friendly. They painted in some new bike lanes in River North and the Gold Coast, so there are actually some east-west bike lanes downtown, but they put them in on the roads that had the most uneven pavement I've ever seen. Like, they painted one onto Grand out from Navy Pier and basically all it does is partition off all the potholes so cars don't have to drive over them and there is literally a lengthwise speed bump down the middle of it, forcing you to either hug the sides of parked cars or ride in traffic that feels like it's justified in running you over because you have a bike lane now. It's amazing.

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Jesus fuck. Well, Portland is still in the lead. We're at $88. I don't understand. I mean, no- I do. We have no sales tax, so it kind of makes sense... Maybe... No, screw that. It's ridiculously overpriced. CTA still has student discount pass fares, right?

Before I start biking in Chicago again, I'm gonna need to learn how to do an emergency roadside patch job. Two flat tires in a week in 2008 was more than I can deal with thinking about. I swear they use broken glass in their cement mix.

...Oh geez. Seriously? Grand? HAHAHAH. I did Grand one night at like, 3am. Soaking wet. Drunk. Through the industrial district between Humboldt and the lake front. So I guess the one improvement would be like, now all you have to dodge are potholes, and not cars, buses, AND potholes?

Please don't die.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

No sales tax? Man... did you hear that Chicago's is up to 11%? And we still can't properly fund the CTA because they stuck that stupid "seniors ride free" thing on there that even most seniors find completely insane. They do still have student fares, but the university has to actually participate in the program (then again, I think the only university that doesn't is the UofC because cheaper CTA rides for its students are too expensive and would put a financial burden on its students).

Omg, the industrial district... I took Division west over to Ashland over the summer and I was convinced I was going to get killed, either by cars or by flipping headfirst over potholes or by being run off a bridge or by Cabrini Green (they actually tore most of it down in late summer/fall, along with the projects just south of Chinatown. It's really weird). Someday it'll be clear to me why north-south travel in Chicago is easy and east-west travel (no matter where you are) is scary, inconvenient, and potentially dangerous.

You know... as far as flat tires go, I got two in a week over the summer, at the same intersection, and then I didn't get any more after that. It was weird. I have a patch kit, but I'm still pretty fail about actually making it work. Last time I tried I somehow ended up with more holes in the tire than I started with and I had to haul it in to the shop in defeat. Plus I can't figure out how to remove my rear tire correctly without making everything else fall apart.

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Yeah, no sales tax, but we definitely suffer for it, like, as far as public services and stuff goes. It's nice, don't get me wrong, but I wouldn't mind paying 5-6% if more shit got done. 11%... Ugh... I keep thinking about that and sort of cringing when I think about moving back. But fuck it, whatever, I don't really spend enough money to have a panic attack about it.

Dude, they tore down the projects in Chinatown? So like, what... There are three buildings left down there or something? DOES IT STILL SMELL LIKE WARM, WET CHEESE?! I think metropolitan biking is an extreme sport. I think there's just no getting around that and the sooner we suck it up and start viewing it that way, the sooner we'll be able to justify full-body padding and just get on with our lives.

...Maybe I'll just buy some of those reinforced Kevlar tires.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I don't even really notice the sales tax anymore, except when I go home or get dragged up to the suburbs to go grocery shopping and suddenly everything is cheaper.

Not the ones in Chinatown, but just outside of Chinatown, where people always run across the street in front of cars regardless of whether anything is going to stop. They were just across the street from the creepy round towers and half-moon thing (the empty lots here (http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=chicago+chinatown&sll=41.796424,-87.589022&sspn=0.007919,0.01929&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Chinatown,+Chicago,+Cook,+Illinois&ll=41.850879,-87.626878&spn=0.003956,0.009645&t=h&z=17), since google has apparently updated the satellite pictures recently). Chinatown is still wholly intact and smelling like itself. (-;

Kevlar tires would be amazing. And... they're not as insanely expensive as I thought they'd be, actually (I was expecting like, $100 per).

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I figure so long as I'm not trying to, idk, raise a family or something in downtown Chicago, I don't have much room to complain. I was just hyper-aware of it when I worked Eddie Bauer because all the dumbass people would come in and buy half the store and then throw a shitfit that the tax was so high. Like we aren't a chain and they can't just go to the mall in their hometown and buy the same stuff for a fraction of the tax price. /eyeroll

Oh, Chinatown. It's so tied in with like, all my extremely misplaced feelings about missing things like public transit and like. I guess Chicago in general. That bakery that had all the randomly-filled buns. And my tupperware collection, or those parts of it that weren't purchased at Chicago Foods. And warm, wet cheese.

RIGHT?! I'm Craigslisting a bike when I get there and just getting it bomb-proofed or whatever. ...Watch me die, anyway.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Ugh, yes, I imagine the tourist population is insufferable when it comes to our sales tax. I dunno, I think I'd kind of expect there'd be some kind of exploitation like that in a major city (I really don't think we'd have that sales tax if midwestern tourists didn't flock here to shop)... but that's probably more thought than can be expected from most on the matter.

Hey, at least no one will be able to shoot you in the tires. That counts for something.

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Yeah, okay, so some days I totally didn't mind forking over money to buy groceries or whatever, just with the knowledge that we could so successfully scalp out-of-city consumer morons. That felt good.

Right? I think I'll steal some of the Kevlar gloves from work, too. Just you know, for funsies. MY HANDS ARE A PRIZED COMMODITY, OKAY? ART SCHOOL. DAMMIT.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Hehe, that's one way to think about it. I just wish it was easier for me to trek out of the city to make larger purchases. My mom got me a pizza stone for Christmas and we had to return it because it had a chip out of it. I re-bought it here and had to pay an extra $5 in tax on it.

By that theory I should get a... um... kevlar... brain-liner? Hmm...

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

For what it's worth, uh... I have a car now. So. Yeah.

Dude, like, I'm trying REALLY HARD not to freak myself out about moving back. Like, I'm only applying to two schools right now, both in Chicago, because I really want to move back (and not be in Portland for awhile), but like. What if I don't get in to either of them? I will be SO FUCKED on SO MANY LEVELS.

...Okay, that's out of my system now. For the next five minutes.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

I think you're probably in good shape as far as acceptance goes. You already have experience in the field and a good academic history, so as long as your essays and things are okay you should be fine (and considering the complete lack of writing ability I've witnessed from people with secondary degrees... yeah. I'm sure they're fine).

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

Thanks. It's nice to hear from someone outside my head once in awhile.

That said, I mean. Yeah. I know. But... I'll believe it when I have the acceptance letters, you know?

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I know the feeling. When do acceptance letters go out, anyway? Is it on the same schedule as undergrad acceptance (Aprilish)?

[look-alive.livejournal.com]

I really hope it's before then. I'm getting my apps out hopefully this and next week, so... Yeah. And my lease is up April 30th. I want to stay in Portland for awhile and work, but I need to figure out where I'll live in the interim and all this other stuff and just... Ugh. I need to know either way for how to plan.

[zolac-no-miko.livejournal.com]

That Eiffel Tower story is pretty excellent. I've told it to people.

I'm pretty sure I hallucinated The Blessed Ranieri, and I didn't even hallucinate see the real thing!

What?! No one confessed their love to you last year?! That's completely unheard of!! (Guess it's too late for me to fuck with your statistics....)

Which major landmark did you nearly fall asleep in front of? Did you nearly have interesting dreams?

...Do you think the death of Stig is related on a cosmic level to the identity reveal and consequent firing of his namesake?

Here's to conquering your arch-enemy in 2011. Fuck car doors! I think you should start carrying a baseball bat when you ride.

In other news... do you think the rain of 1000 dead redwing blackbirds over a mile of yards, streets, and roofs in Beebe, Arkansas, on New Year's Morning is a sign of what we should expect from this year?

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Hey, I think it's the first year that was completely love-confession-free. I suppose it's possible to ruin this year's statistics early, though. (-;

I almost fell asleep in front of Notre Dame. There was a guy in a tattered Quadsimodo mask who was sneaking up behind tourists and if I'd managed to dream, it probably would've been of him.

I've always chalked the Stig's death up to the fact that he was a black Stig, and those are doomed to die (though it didn't involve nitrous, or the ocean, or even going very fast). Actually, given the timing, I'm worried me allowing my Stig to die led to the betrayal of the real Stig.

I think I'm going to check and see if the Art Institute will loan me one of their suits of armor instead. It's not as obvious, then, that I have it in for car doors, but I could probably do even more damage. Plus people would probably avoid me because I'd look crazy and nothing makes the road safer than people actually avoiding you.

And that blackbird thing? That is weird. I can't imagine what caused that. (Well, I can, but they mostly involve things like "Emergency TARDIS landing" and "death ray" and "avian mind control.") There was also one dead duck. That may be the key to solving it.

[zolac-no-miko.livejournal.com]

The duck! Of course! I think you may be on to something.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

I keep picturing some kind of murder-suicide scenario where the blackbirds just pushed him too far.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Very entertaining year-end wrap-up. I give it a thumbs up! (And I've read a LOT in the last few days. Or, at least--I've pretended to read them.)

I ♥ your Eiffel Tower story. In fact, I am still in awe of your entire trip! One day I'll do something like that. For the moment, though, Europe is just not ready for me and my attempts to Speak Other Languages. (Really, all it takes is a little champagne, and suddenly I am multi-lingual.)

Ooh, what extravagant kitchen accessories have you purchased?

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks. I've found the recaps that have no planning or theme to speak of work best. (-;

I am trying to pick my next cities for adventure, but I've realized I'm mostly out of cities that I have even the slightest idea of the language in. I'm down to my list of Asian cities and... yeah. I'm going to need a tour guide, and despite the fact that one of my friends manages to occasionally forget that I can't read Chinese there has yet to be a single instance of me getting any of the tones right when I try to repeat things I hear in Chinese.

I bought a pasta maker attachment for my mixer and a pizza stone (well, actually the pizza stone was a gift, but I had to re-buy it in Chicago since the one my mom had shipped to the house had a chip out of it).

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

I have several friends whose parents are/speak Chinese (mostly Cantonese, I do believe), and...yeah, I don't know what's going on there. I just know that when I visit my one friend's parents' restaurant, I hear long strings of incomprehensible Cantonese followed by my friend's voice: "No, Mom, Amy doesn't have a job right now..."

And my other friend's mom always insists I need a fork, despite my friend's assurances that I'm more than competent with chopsticks. (I have a look that just screams "clueless white girl".)

The closest thing I have to any sort of fetish is my intense love for kitchen gadgets. A pizza stone! ♥ And what sort of mixer do you have?

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

I've gotten to the point where I can recognize a few key words, but mostly I just pick out the words and names that are already in English.

That fork assumption always annoys me! I haven't encountered any of their parents, but whenever we go out to dinner or for dim sum or something everyone else at the table gets chopsticks and the waiter inevitably brings me a fork and takes my chopsticks away.

I adore my pizza stone already. I've made pizza, I've made quesadillas on it, I have plans for a near-infinity of bread... and today it occurred to me that if my bed was ever particularly cold I use the stone for that, too. Why did these things ever pass from common use?

I have a lovely imperial grey Kitchenaid. My mom actually apologized to me when she got it, because she was afraid I'd never use it but she couldn't think of anything else to get me and it was "something everyone should have". I don't think a week has gone by since I got it that it hasn't seen some use.

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

I love my Kitchenaid mixer! (I would love it more if we had counter space for it--for now it has to live in the garage!)

I bought it at a garage sale for $20.00!

It hasn't occurred to me before to desire a pizza stone, but now that it has... (I'll be dreaming of it tonight! My God, woman, how has it not been in your bed yet?!?)

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Aw, poor mixer! Mine has to live on my kitchen table (along with pretty much everything else, since I have enough counter space for a dish rack and a cutting board and no more). My mom's Kitchenaid belonged to her mother or her aunt, and it's been around for more than 50 years. She had the motor reworked and is considering getting the bowl re-tinned, but that's it.

There are actually a couple of things preventing me from abusing the stone as a bed-warmer. 1) I still haven't found a way to get my apartment under 70 degrees, even with all the radiators off. 2) My bed is lofted and I have this horrible image of waking up to find my pizza stone on the floor, broken. Possibly a floor down and broken, with some very confused downstairs neighbors. (My stone is also unnecessarily extravagant, as it's the All-Clad soapstone one. It's gorgeous and looks like marble but it apparently doesn't take much of a tumble to break one and I know I can't afford to replace it.)

[apple-pathways.livejournal.com]

Our talk of chopsticks has forced me to make and eat noodles at 11:00 pm. I regret nothing! (For once, I managed not to overcook the egg.)

Those are all very excellent reasons not to bring your pizza stone into bed with you. You are a very responsible pizza stone parent!

And since we haven't dished yet about the latest round at thegameison_sh: what did you think of the winning fics?

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Don't even get me hungry now, right before I go to bed! (For once, I aim to be asleep before midnight.)

I... actually only read the winning one (which, while good, was one giant reference to canon so... I don't even know). Other than my initial brainstorming and a hurried attempt at finishing something the Wednesday before the deadline, I kind of didn't do much for the last challenge. (And I'm kind of sad, because I really wanted to write my fic about Mycroft being the CEO of Google and Sherlock fussing around in his basement with Wolfram Alpha. It had jokes about data structures. (-; Or the fic in which everyone is a hipster in Brooklyn and Sherlock is trying to solve the mystery of the Red Bees in Red Hook (http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/30/nyregion/30bigcity.html).) I have a feeling I'm going to have some very specific and predictable opinions about the round that I will email to you at a later date once I get around to reading everything, though. (-;

Before that, though, I have to get un-blocked on my sherlockmas fic. Omg I am so late already and I feel awful, but the dialog is not coming to me and I have ditched three drafts already, I cannot ditch another. ::flail::

[flutingfrenzy.livejournal.com]

Friends from the internets met IRL: (at least) 1!

(Seriously, the three days I spent ruining my feet in Chicago were a collective bright spot in what was otherwise a pretty pathetic year.)

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

You were the only internet envoy to visit this year, actually.

I was going to include that adventure in my list, but then I was like "Wait, what if she thinks that's kind of weird?" It's still pretty much the most fun I've had on the north side. And I'm still surprised we didn't get turned away from that restaurant, considering we were both sopping wet. (-;

[flutingfrenzy.livejournal.com]

Hee, I see you've added it now...and included the name of the restaurant for convenient reference the next time someone I know visits Chicago and (for some reason) asks me to recommend a place for dinner ("They let you in even if you look like a drowned rat!").

Also:

Arch-Enemy: CAR DOORS

I laughed. Sorry.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Just make sure you include a disclaimer as to letting in only people who look like drowned rats. I don't want to implicate them in some kind of damp rat hospitality scandal. (-;

It's okay to laugh at the car doors now, they're not Serious Business again until March. ^_^