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Clearly today I must've been punished on a relatively small cosmic scale for the three separate conversations I had last night that basically would amount to Machiavelli's The Prince II: The Internet. (I'm sure he'd be particularly proud of the chapter on giving potential followers strawberry jam.) Because I went to bed last night at fourish, and was awakened this morning at about nine by three telemarketers in a row. Then I laid down on the couch and went back to sleep until ten, when my sister got up and talked for a while rather loudly on her cell phone to her friend in Akron, then disappeared to parts unknown (probably Akron) in her car. I finally fell asleep a third time, only to be awakened again around 11 by Jehova's Witnesses. I should've just not answered the door, I suppose, and pretened to be asleep. But there's a giant picture window in our living room, and it looks straight in onto the couch where I was asleep. And it was clear that I wasn't after they knocked. So I got up and answered the door, and they were actually nice and not pushy, as far as Jehova's Witnesses go. And I probably made them uncomfortable because I was half awake, unkempt, and answered the door in my PJs... which today happened to be the green shirt I was wearing yesterday, a pair of mis-matched knee-high black socks (one's got pink stars, the other has rainbow stripes), and my knee-length baggy pirate pants (which have a habit of almost always being about to fall off unless I tie them tightly... which I don't when I pull them out of my pile of clothes at random in the middle of the night in order to sleep in them). It's not as bad as the lady that answered the door in not but her underoos when I was going door-to-door raising money for the marching band in high school, but it probably leaves an impression.
Also, now I know that we're not supposed to get blood transfusions. And angels aren't the souls of dead people. I can't wait to get to the article on marriage. But my dad's probably going to make fun of me when he gets up for talking to them for like fifteen minutes. Thankfully, all I've learned has been in the literature, because they didn't preach at me. Just implied the world was going to end soon. Maybe the afterlife will be thrown off by my strange attire, too. ... What if I'm sorted in with the pirates for all eternity? I don't think that'd go over well with them... I think I should make a point not to be wearing these pants in the afterlife. Unless I've got a good hat. Maybe I could spend eternity with pirates if I had a good hat.
See. Door-to-door religion has got me thinking about all the important questions now.
Also, now I know that we're not supposed to get blood transfusions. And angels aren't the souls of dead people. I can't wait to get to the article on marriage. But my dad's probably going to make fun of me when he gets up for talking to them for like fifteen minutes. Thankfully, all I've learned has been in the literature, because they didn't preach at me. Just implied the world was going to end soon. Maybe the afterlife will be thrown off by my strange attire, too. ... What if I'm sorted in with the pirates for all eternity? I don't think that'd go over well with them... I think I should make a point not to be wearing these pants in the afterlife. Unless I've got a good hat. Maybe I could spend eternity with pirates if I had a good hat.
See. Door-to-door religion has got me thinking about all the important questions now.
