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Dear Internet,
You are really not being interesting at all today. It's really not helping me get any reading done, because I feel compelled to see if anything interesting has happened between chapters. If you'd just come up with something interesting my distraction would be satisfied and I could go back to reading more quickly. But no... no, you've got to taunt me with your void. You can expect a letter of complaint to your direct superiors if this behaviour continues, and I will not hesitate to get you fired.
Much Love,
me
You are really not being interesting at all today. It's really not helping me get any reading done, because I feel compelled to see if anything interesting has happened between chapters. If you'd just come up with something interesting my distraction would be satisfied and I could go back to reading more quickly. But no... no, you've got to taunt me with your void. You can expect a letter of complaint to your direct superiors if this behaviour continues, and I will not hesitate to get you fired.
Much Love,
me
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