...

[evilhippo]

I need to stop sitting here laughing at things that no one else can see. But really, how do you keep a straight face when you read something like this?

"Well, I've heard much about you Harry. We have much in common. You see, Voldemort killed my parents the same night he killed yours. I survived the Crucio curse too."
"Wow! I didn't know that. Sorry for asking, but......why are your ears pointy?" Harry asked.
"I am an Elf." Legolas said.

Seriously... bad fanfiction has got to be some of the most amusing stuff ever written.

[Edit a few days later: Oh, and this is my 800th entry. Booyah!]

Comments

[chocolatemoose.livejournal.com]

um.
this was.. actually written?
goodness.

that's horribly funny.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Hehehe... oh yes, that was written. There was one I found earlier about angels getting their wings clipped of with giant plyers. And one that had some kind of goddess that ran around on a horse in Hogwarts with a fire extinguisher.

That particular quote comes from babb_chronicles, and deleterious is wonderful for bad Harry Potter and LoTR fics. However, some of the worst fics I have ever come across are naturally in the anime fandoms (like the horrible Elricest one that includes a line about "dirty humping," among many horribly physically impossible and gross things, and the amazingly bad Naruto one that the quote in my icon comes from. Well actually it was the person mocking it that has the quote. The fic itself was quotable in different ways. Though, very little matches up to the horrible written-by-a-twelve-year-old TonksxHarry fic that included every kind of disturbing sexual act ever. I could only skim over it it was so painful). I've sort of become a connaisseur of badfics. The communities are such a great way to pass time.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

... everyone knows I meant deleterius for that second one. (That probably won't work either. I such at LJ code. It's here (http://www.livejournal.com/community/deleterius/).

[chocolatemoose.livejournal.com]

um.
this was.. actually written?
goodness.

that's horribly funny.

[edhorch.livejournal.com]

Great. Now I get to clean the coffee out of my keyboard. And people are going to stare as I giggle to myself all day today whenever this comes back to mind. Thank you VERY MUCH.

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Well, as long as I'm not the only one who randomly giggled about it whenever it came to mind. (I claim no responsibility for the keyboard though). (-;

Just out of curiosity, how did you end up here?

[edhorch.livejournal.com]

IIRC, the joke was quoted in someone else's journal, with a citation back to here. IOW, it was essentially random hyperlink traversal (which I do when I'm dialed into long boring teleconferences at work).

[evilhippo.livejournal.com]

Lol, wow. That's weird and awesome at the same time, since I'm pretty sure it wasn't anyone I actually know that linked back here (or at least no one on my friends list). Now I feel compelled to find out what path it took through the internet. ^_^

I hope you didn't end up laughing at it when anyone might have heard you during the teleconference. (-:

[edhorch.livejournal.com]

I do a lot of random clicking. If I see a comment that I find interesting, I'll usually check out the blog of the person who wrote the comment, since their blogs tend to be interesting as well. (Of course, I also run into "OMFG i cant bileive she said that abuot meeee!" noise.) Unfortunately, that means that after a few hops, I've pretty much forgotten how I got there, especially if my clickstream is no longer inact.

And I'm VERY careful about keeping my headset muted if I'm not actually speaking, more because people walk into my office and just start talking at me, ignoring the headset. I think I'm going to order one of those big red lighted On The Phone signs...